The 2nd Annual Ayahuasca Monologues

I mean, the most simple thing I want to express is that when I read these comments I was hurt (because I'm one of the presenters).

I want to be careful not to project anger from the hurt that I feel when I read the comments left here, but I'd be lying if I said that I am above not feeling hurt after reading this.

Some of the remarks here are perhaps coming from valid places of concern. But I'd like to disagree with some of what's been written, too.

First, I'd like to ask why it's so impossible to refrain from all the unconstructive criticism, the biting cynicism, and the mean-heartedness?

What I don't understand is this. If you feel so much more enlightened and above all of us who are presenting, then why not teach us what you know, that which you presume we have not understood about our own characters, in the spirit of love and kindness?

I'm all about having someone point out my flaws and actively evolving through my own weaknesses. I think this is why I drink Ayahuasca. I want to be a more loving human being, if its possible.

I first traveled to the Amazon to drink Ayahuasca after searching for something to medicinally treat a host of addictions I was struggling with. I had worked with entheogens and psychedelics for years, but I was seeking ritual and ceremony. I have now worked with Ayahuasca for several years in Peru. I am by no means an expert on anything.

I can only testify to my own personal experience: Ayahuasca has been a great healer and a great teacher to me.

I don't share your view about "ayahuasca tourism." While your concern may be totally legitimate, I don't hear concern in the voice of your post. I hear anger and cynicism.

To me that is a tell, like a card game. I think cynicism clouds our ability to tell the truth in love. And usually if I'm speaking like that to someone, I am most often speaking from a place of hurt or personal pain. I could be wrong. To classify myself or Fabian or any of us presenting some of our Ayahuasca stories as "phonies," or saying that you'd like to hurl old vegetables at us feels mean to me.

Plain and simple. It's mean.

I've met many people in Peru who have come from all over the world to seek medicinal healing with the plants of the Amazon. To classify the many unique people I've met as "druggies" or "tourists" would be unfair and insensitive. I've met maybe one or two visiting people out of hundreds in Peru whose motives I have ever questioned.

And I believe that there are a number of ways to think about how the medicine is gaining popularity in Peru--not all of which are entirely negative. 

My point by responding here is simple. You might be right about some of your claims, and you might have something to teach the world. Hell, you might have something to teach me personally.

Your criticisms---any of them, could be fair.

But why would you try to put me down instead of build me up while doing so? Can't you speak your concerns and criticisms with simultaneous care for my heart, or the hearts of any of the presenters?

Adam Elenbaas

There are many interesting ideas being presented within this post for a social gathering that is optional for those willing to enter its door.

I do think it is importent to ponder upon how these medicines affect people, and I shall refrain from drawing many a metaphor that we each could easily envision... I understand the apprehension of Ayuhausca entering "mainstream", but we should remember RS isn't exactly mainstream- yet. These sorts of medicines seem to come to those who need them. From my quick learning of it, it seems that its healing is very direct and to the point. Perhaps it is unveiling itself so it can help others- if time is such an issue as many bealive...

Now, the "DO" of each person, is personal. What is done here on the pages of RS does have an effect upon the world, perhaps it doesn't dent as deeply as a Range Rover would into a Ford Tempo, but it does leave its mark. For me, RS is a way to "DO" something. My "DO" is writing, loving, and bealiving in those I love. So, I would say that the work on RS does do something to the Big Picture, just as a little bit of salt makes a cucumber taste all the much better. Or celery seed... I hear tell that's pretty tasty... ;)

Propaganda Anonymous One thing I've become aware of about message boards is that it is very easy to forget that we are speaking to other people.

So the balence between 'airing out' and ranting, which I'm not totally opposed to, and compassionate communication is a fine one at that.

As Travis Smiley stated on Bill Maher's show about what made Martin Luther King Jr. such an amazing speaker is that he used a 'love language.' Especially when speaking about such hard issues as the Vietnam war, Etc.

So what I've learned in forums like these is that I find it necessary, Just For Me, to try to phrase my intense feelings about certain things in a linguistic structure that veers away from 'Why I'm so Right, and You are so Wrong! '

And 'I speak the Truth!'

See what I'm saying?

Anyway, that's just me. I do think there are definetely cool times to Rant. Bill Hicks and George Carlin, both heroes of mine, do so in such great ways.

OK, So this Ayahuasca situation. My 2 Cents. I find I agree with parts of what xanadu and eco are saying, while also finding value in the responses.

My own personal experience with the vine in this Capitalistic society has sometimes shown me some things about 'The Community' that I was very disappointed to see. I have seen Price-gouging. Which happened to me and my girlfriend by 'organizers' for dietas. I have ceased communicating with certain people, and boycotted their 'organizing' efforts because of a very disturbing experience with people Who I Thought Were Friends, and fellow intrepid traveles along this journey. And this personal boycot has led me to working with the vine less than if I just accepted such disreputable behavior.

If I did so I would be sacrificing dignity for divinity, which to me leads to cultish activity. Something I try to stay away from. 

I have also noticed a pattern in some people who use Ayahuasca that annoys me as well. Some of these people are just snobs with money, who have been afforded a certain amount of professional authority in their own lives and then they do Yage, like twice, and start talking like they're enlightened.

I have just watched these fools play themselves. And kept silent, which wasn't always easy, but again The Fools Play Themselves Out.

As Eco stated about the Feminine quality of this mysteriously beautiful substance, I have not picked up any obligation to stand high atop a mountain and declare that I Am here to save the world because of Ayahuasca. That is the 'Savior Trap.' John Lilly has got some cool stuff to say about that Trap.

And at the same time too, I have asked the Vine if it was ok for me to start speaking about my own experiences with it, and the response I got back(or maybe self-generated...cause Come on now, do we really know what is going on, really?) The response I received was one of Loving Indifference. As if 'she' was saying to me, 'Oh little child, you wish to speak of me to others? That's Fine. Do your thing. Be HAPPY'

In conclusion, I have found Assholes in every corner of this fine earth. And yes I have even found Assholes within these circles. I have learned to walk away from my bitterness that I felt because I had my own Expectations that Ayahuasca=Enlightenment.

This journey is long and varied. The concept of Bushido comes up for me. So I've also learned Compassion for others. We are all on our own individual trips here in Space-Time while simultaneously being inextricably tied in with everyone else. Ah, The Paradox of this Life, haha.

In my own life, I will start speaking more publicly about what I've learned from Yage. For me the 'sacred contract' seems to be 'Do Not Make Ayahuasca a gimmick that provides for most of my income!'

Even if other people have done it.

When it comes down to it, the only spirits they harm are their own.

I stay away from liars.

I watch the fools play themselves out.

And I just try to speak to people in as much of a heart felt way as I possibly can about Ayahuasca.

Cheers....

PS As Joe Strummer has said, "There's a mirror in your Soul. You should turn it to the Sky"

PAZ Ya'll

In "western" contexts ayahuasca is often placed high on a mantle, deified by some, capitalized upon, etc. But this is a projection, it is not "inaction or weakness" on the part of the ayahuasca, it is the weakness and illness of the drinker. It is also, in some cases, related to traditional brujeria. Ayahuasca is a powerful technology and it can be used for good or ill.

Or somewhere in between, or sometimes beyond.

If you choose to do good, then it helps to know the illnesses - in order to be aware of them, avoid them, transform them.


In contemporary/western etc situations ayahuasca is (to some) a brand new thing with an awesome new lightshow. But in the jungles and in the jungle cities, to the average person, ayahuasca is somewhat common, like asprin or coffee or green tea.  I'd rather not put it in those terms, but simply, everyone knows about it, probably drank it for a very practical reason and/or has an uncle/aunt/cousin/friend/brother/sister who may or may not be a shaman or healer or knows one or has studied with one and on and on and on. It's no big secret.

And in these jungle cities (ie:Iquitos) they've still got casinos and fumes and mobile phones and internet and cocaine and drunkeness and sin and vice of all description!

And yet the curanderos there still do their work, people still get healed from their snakebite, their arthritis, their stomach cramps, their soul loss, their money problems, their bad luck and on and on and on.

In these places ayahuasca is used to continue the healthy flow of life. For a shaman/curandero to take care of a tribe or attend to a village or simply be the local river doctor is in some sense, the equivalent of "saving the world".

In our western/urban/contemporary contexts that notion is too immense for some, and so perhaps they falter. Or perhaps, in the rush to "save the world", and striving to the reach the ecstacy and efficacy of a shaman, they falter again.

Some describe that what constitutes a brujo, is someone who couldn't hack their shamanic training and therefore left an "incomplete shaman".

So, take that down a notch and there is the presence of "incomplete" ayahuasca use. Disrespectful ayahuasca use.

Certainly some of the urban/contemporary ayahuasca use is not an ideal situation. But as cringe-inducing as it may sometimes seem, people are simply getting the hang of it. Or not.

I feel there is benefit (and yet serious challenge) in developing a personal relationship with the ayahuasca. Especially when in the swirl and temptation of western/contemporary/urban centers and cultures. Perhaps it is a matter of going beyond cultures and into the realm and responsibility of the individual.


"The 'heart of a warrior,' courage, ability to face the truth, and knowing one's true calling without fear of extremes or 'ugly  things' are the qualities of the shaman."
---Guillermo Arevalo, Curandero, Shipibo-Conibo, Peru.


"It’s a pity that at a time when people came along with the sensitivity, openness and intellectual preparation to really start thinking about what these shamanic practices were about—as opposed to say a Schultes, who would just observe those states and say "they were intoxicated"—we almost came along a generation or two too late.

When you travel in the Amazon people say that all the real shaman have died off. And even by most anthropological accounts the last of the really highly trained shaman died around 1965..."
---Wade Davis, Author, Botanist, Adventurer, interviewed by Peter Gorman.


Patience, everyone is learning.

well, a fair plethora of prose above, and I just want to posit that this is one of THE more direct and experiential medicines on the planet these days. so methinks that words are beside the point (although the pingponging is fascinating). sit in the presence of and be precise if you feel directed to attach language to the experience - beyond an invitation to pay attention to to the invitation to pay attention.

not to be missed on the planet these days....

ecolocal: Do you find it ironic that you seem to have so much to say about ayahuasca?
;)

Ayahuasca once "said" to me: There are no rules, only guides.
;)

Ayahuasca is not "fight club" - there is no first rule about not talking about it. Just because people discuss it or tell about thier experiences does not make them shamans or neo-shamans in any way, shape or form. But talking about it does help some people to integrate their experiences.

ecolocal: "it is pointless and counter-productive to go on about what ayahuasca supposedly showed you."

How so?


A great deal of what you are saying seems to be bound up with your own fears, prejudices and projections.



ecolocal: "All the info on ayahuasca is out there"

Oh, good. Everything about it is cleared up and  alphabetized somewhere. Mystery solved. Phew...

For a second I thought there was a lot to learn.


"To sum up, my position is that if you are truly in touch with  the ayahuasca current, you'd keep quiet about it and your use of it, and talk about the messages themselves if you feel like talking."

So you know the "true" way to use ayahuasca?

There are many ways to ride and flow with that current.

Some act boldy, some act subtly, some make amends, some are still learning, some keep very quiet, some feel like talking, some talk about what they've learned. No harm in this. But there is potential harm in pretending this is a big unspeakable secret (which btw, is a form of exclusivity/elitism).

In the jungle, if you ask a curandero or some ayahuasquero about Yage, they do not say "I can't talk about that."  

It is often more to the effect of "Yes, come with me, Ill show you what I know, and if you want, Ill brew you some and you can find out for yourself."

Ayahuasca is not simple, it is not one thing or one way. It is many things and many ways.

What are you so afraid of?


Of course respect is very important. But this respect can take on many forms. If one is full of themselves, full of ego, prejudice, confusion and so forth, the ayahuasca will make one face that shit sooner or later.

-

One of the best books I've read about ayahuasca is Yaje, The New Purgatory. Encounters with Ayahuasca by Jimmy Weiskopf. He talks at great length, with great respect and great insight about a lot of things in there and his some 30 years(?) experience with Yage in Colombia.

The Ayahuasca Monologues is one thing, and is perhaps a view of ayahuasca in an urban context - nothing wrong with that. In Peru there is an upcoming Curandero Seminar, where several respected curandero's will be speaking and teaching about ayahuasca, shamanism, medicinal plants and their uses. There is also an ongoing "teleseminar" for this featuring several curanderos speaking about their work.

And, in July there is the 4th International Amazonian Shamanism Conference. Where many respected Amazonian curanderos, writers, ethnobotanists and international healer folk will discuss their work.

anyway... just sayin'

:)

peace 

As a greater planetary awareness of ayahuasca grows, there seems to be a great deal of anxiety bubbling up surrounding its ethical use. And so my feeling is there needs to be serious (and not so serious) discussion. Those of us who are (culturally) new to ayahuasca (anyone not mestizo or indigenous) would do well to gather together and sing.

During ayahuasca, the curandero's singing guides the experience and if one find's oneself in a tight situation, singing can whisk one away to a better place.

Perhaps this (tight?) situation of ayahuasca in contemporary/urban/western culture can be seen or referenced as something like music.

There is no "absolute" way in which to engage music. There are many forms of music. There are many styles and ways of ayahuasca drinking.

I'm not particulary interested in "goa-trance", so I don't go to goa-trance raves. Nor am I very interested in "death metal", so I've never really hung out with death metal heads.

Similarly, I've little interest in attending a Santo Daime ceremony or a UDV ceremony. Nor am I particulary drawn to urban ceremonies such as the one recently described in the LA Times.

But I'm certain many interesting and worthwhile things are taking place there. Something is happening on some level, to say the least, and by and large it is good for those involved - or simply a whole ton better than so much of the horror and shit and hell of the planetary crisis, "the real world" etc.

So, in general, ayahuasca drinkers of any type have my respect.

Of course, similar to encountering "bad music", there can be bad ayahuasca ceremonies. Or incomplete shamans/brujeria/trickery/ego etc.

So perhaps one should learn and discern what kind of music they like, or what ayahuasca path will be most effective for them personally.



And then sing a little bit every now and then.


Can ayahuasca alone save the world? Who knows.

But it does seem to be interested in symbiosis. Because if we do destroy the planet, how then will the vine grow?

Propaganda Anonymous Eco and Morgan. I would just like to commend both of you.

That interchange and debate was great During these past few years I have thought on both sides of the spectrum you guys are speaking from.

Kudos guys and Thank You

Hi there--

 I imagine I'm one of many to write with similar questions, but here goes. I am planning to take ayahuasca for the first time. I will be going to South America in less than 2 weeks, and I'll have 2 months to spend there. I would love to get any personal recommendations for places, shamans, etc that you have experienced personally. I have been doing my research, but Im finding it difficult to know where I should go, and who I should trust. I suppose, that in the end, i'll have to trust myself, but I'd still like to perhaps contact a few people directly, if you wouldn't mind, to hear some firsthand advice/suggestions (only of course, if you've had the firsthand experience). I am a really easy going iand down to earth person, and I'm not trying to overthink anything here, but it is important for me to go about this in a responsible, humble, and respectful manner.  As I said, I'll have  about 2 months free. I have been traveling quite a lot lately, and don't necessarily care about touring around -- in fact, what i'd ideally like to do is find somewhere where i could stay for a month or 2, and really sit and learn. I realize that these days, nearly every tourist is trying to avoid the touristy things -- and paradoxically, i'm no different, but i'm also occasionally guilty of being practical. I don't want to be a typical ayahuasca tourist, nor can i afford to stay at some of the fancy retreats that I'm seeing online. But I don't necessarily want to wander around in search of a shaman in a place where they have ayahuasca touts at the airports now. So I don't know how to go about this, and i hope you can empathize with my quandry. This is why I am writing, and this where I ask for your assistance, if you can. So I hope I can get some unbiased and honest feedback on this site from people who have had direct experiences. I was planning to stay close to Colombia because Im flying into there, (i.e. Peru, Ecudor, etc). And I am aware that one can take ayahuasca in places other than South America, but I will be there anyway and figured it made sense to try it there. Anyway, thank you very much for reading this to the end. My personal email is seaoharewhy@hotmail.com. I would be most appreciative of any advice, contacts, or recommendations you could offer. I look forward to hearing from anyone who takes the time to respond...